Monday, April 5, 2010

Love Her Anyway

Just finishing up spring break yesterday, I was trying to relax in my sunny backyard, but twirling (reliving a conversation in my head that was disappointing), when suddenly a voice popped into my mind that repeated over and over again, LOVE HER ANYWAY! LOVE HER ANYWAY! I had been twirling because I felt that the individual with whom I had just spoken was less than supportive and unable to really see me. I began to think of other times, people, and situations where there had been disagreement, stress, and anxiety due to different perspectives. As that still voice whispered in my ear, LOVE HER ANYWAY, peace and acceptance washed over me and replaced the twirl. Why can't we just love each other anyway? Is it really so hard to love someone who doesn't agree with us, support our every choice, or even fully see our most authentic self? Is that the other person's job anyway?

It dawned on me that we could save our children hours upon hours wasted in twirls, if we could model for them and encourage them to simply LOVE HER ANYWAY, without strings, without a need for validation and support, without a desire to change another in some way that better suits our needs. While it seems so difficult to just LOVE HER ANYWAY, sitting in my chair immersed in the blossoming spring all around me, it was actually quite easy; simply a caress, a gentle wave of total acceptance of myself first, and then an inner knowing that all was well with the other, too. I observed that a beautiful cardinal flew gracefully across the yard as my twirl ended, a sure sign that to simply LOVE HER ANYWAY was definitely the highest choice.